How to Get What You Want: Without Having to Ask (Frank Feng's Library) by Richard Templar

Author:Richard Templar
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: FT Press
Published: 2012-04-28T16:00:00+00:00

Admit Your Mistakes

This isn’t the same thing as accepting criticism of course, but it’s closely related. We all know that everyone makes mistakes, and if you won’t admit to them you’re not fooling anyone that you’ve never made any. You may, however, come across as arrogant or pompous or simply unable to recognize when you’re wrong.

I’m not advocating some kind of confessional where you go around admitting to everything you can think of, just to appear humble. You don’t want to undermine people’s confidence in you entirely. But where it’s clear something has gone wrong, and it’s down to you, then say so. People will respect you more for it.

The same goes for mistakes in the past. If you can tell a story against yourself, admitting you got something wrong, it makes you look human and modest and honest and genuine and self-effacing. All of which are good things.

There is one exception to this approach, mind you. I had a friend years ago who was always late for everything, to the point where it was hugely irritating. I remember her saying to me, “I’m dreadful at timekeeping, I know, but at least I can admit it.” I thought, “You mean you know it, you realize the frustration it causes, and you still do it? If you were unaware of the hassle I might conceivably forgive you, but if you know what you’re doing it’s inexcusable.” When you recognize your mistakes, that doesn’t absolve you of any responsibility for correcting them. On the contrary, it makes it imperative.

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